"A hairy cunt is much better to be fucked than a smooth one; it both retains warmth and brushes against the penis."
A Wall Inscription from Pompeii(via ancientpeoples)
You trip and fall to your death.
Critical fail, you swallow a knife and it explodes.
"As the assassin foolishly tries to slide down the gravelly side of the mountain, he trips and slits his throat on his knife. He’s dead. Anyone else want to do anything stupid?"
"You somehow determine that the golem is made of bacon.”
"You go to search the body, but manage instead to trigger the bear trap. I’m rolling damage now."
"You shoot your unconscious bleeding cleric, roll damage. Don’t forget your favored enemy bonus."
"You fail to notice the pit in front of you as you direct your horse to walk into it."
"The mugger then proceeds to shoot his friend in the foot"
"the opponent sneezes and accidentally stabs himself to death"
"You try to pick the door, but the door picks you. You’ve been impaled."
"You let go of the bow instead of its string, and it hits you in the face before falling at your feet."
me: can i just pretend like i totally meant to do that
//rolls a nat 20 on a bluff check
"Everyone totally saw that but it looked like you completely meant to do that."
"The force of your spell sends you flying backwards, missing its target and you also hit your head on a rock. Roll for damage."
"You’re currently underwater, doing a backstroke against the lakes floor while you’re drowning."
- Dated: 18th Century
- Place of Origin: South India, probably from the Mysore area
- Measurements: overall length: 11.5 inches (292mm). Blade length: 6.5 inches (165mm)
The daggers as a heavy cast and chased brass hilt in the form of the head a mythological lion – Yali. The Yali is depicted in different forms depending on the workshop or geographical origin. This one has bulging eyes separated by a high crest to the forehead, leading to the back of the head and around the neck.
It has an open gaping mouth with a curling tongue and sharp tiger like teeth. The cheeks have a detailed freckle pattern. The central grips are plain, with a strange “Z” marking on one side. The bolster is nicely decorated on both sides, and the blade held securely. The blade is plain steel, as is typical with these daggers.
Source: Copyright 2014 © Akaal Arms
“Two Russian soldiers, now prisoners of war, inspect a giant statue of Lenin, somewhere in Russia, torn from its pedestal and smashed by the Germans in their advance, on August 9, 1941. Note the rope round the neck of the statue, left there in symbolic fashion by the Germans.”
- Dated: hilt, 19th century; blade, probably 18th century with early 19th century decoration
- Culture: hilt, Turkish or North African; blade, Iranian, Turkish decoration
- Medium: Steel, gold, horn
The fine blade of crucible (“watered”) steel is typically Iranian but was decorated at a later date by a Turkish craftsman. The decoration includes verses from the “Burda,” a mystical poem by the thirteenth-century author al-Bu Siri.
get the fuck out,no fucken way this is the most coolest thing i have ever seen on tumblr
What if the skelatons up top were little titans?
"There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them, the same became mighty men which were of old, men of renown."
HAS SCIENCE GONE TOO FAR?!